astaghfirullah.astaghfirullah.astaghfirullah..
i feel so weak..helpless..and impossible..there's no way of getting rid this menacing feeling that swells in my chest. just when i thought i was ready, all the expectations crumbled to pieces just in less than one hour.
is it my fault that that i speak nonsense(in a sense that bits of details scattered everywhere speechwise) in the first place? O Allah, give me strength to be on Your path. nothing makes me happier than fullfilling your decree and Your messenger's ways.
Maybe i was never gifted to be a prolific preacher or at least someone who convey good words and knowledge i obtain from my experience travelling around. Things would just get very gibberish and I personally don't like it myself, neither do others.
Well, i'm not perturbed by that fact. the only thing now left is for me act out whatever i've learnt an come to appreciate it. There's nothing sweeter than imaan that fills our heart.
I already found that X-factor i've been looking for ever since I realized there was something wrong inside, me..WHAT ABOUT YOU?
May we will always be in rememberance of Allah.
Subhanallah.Alhamdulillah.Allahuakbar..
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