where's the fire?

i have to admit i'm wallowing in self pity too much these days. it can't be helped. nothing seems to pique my interest at all, let it be songs, movies, quran recitation, khaled yasin's talks, brother nouman ali's talks, video-making, study, blogs, BBC news, alJazeera, cooking,..even chatting to others.

i isolated myself from the world. barricaded.

this is pitiful. am i bipolar?

tell me something else if anyone knows better! yes yes...i'm in moments of difficulty and surely during this period i should be stronger in rememberance of Him. O Allah stregthen my imaan. It hurts when we realize or feel we are no better than ourselves from months ago...years ago...ages ago. the verdict for now is.....CHANGE IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE BY YOURSELF. not gonna deny this. my weakness of all time, the most chronic ever, not recognizing the problem. ..and here i am. I have problem to (urks...what jargon is this? it means mujahadahstruggle ok!), fighting the demons that haunted me for ages now.

"Allah does not burden a person beyond his ability. He will be rewarded for that which he has earned, and punished for that which he has earned...." (al Baqarah:286)

So, verily, with every difficulty, there is relief. Verily, with every difficulty there is relief. (94:5-6)


By Time.
Verily Man is in LOSS.
Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds,
and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth,
and of Patience and Constancy.

(103: 1-3)


A lot of things in this world are clear and need no further enlightening (sudah terang lagi bersuluh tak perlu obor olympic nak bagi terang), explanation, elaboration or debate. it's just us. we just do not listen! ketegaq!

i should know second best. i snapped!

astaghfirullah. astaghfirullah. astaghfirullah.

May Allah bless us and guide us in the righteous path.

till hereafter.

till then.